I think of the rainbow babes like this... the rainbow after the storm of sorrow. We are suffering through the storm of sorrow when the universe lets up on the storm and we get a reprise in our sorrow, there is a RAINBOW. They do not "undo" or erase the storm they just make the enduring the storm a little more hopeful. Chris~ Mommy to ^Lucy^ & Danger

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Introducing Amellia Rose


Arrival at the hospital on 12/11/09
Welcome Amellia Rose

My first time holding her

The proud daddy- Look at that Grin
Our first family picture
Pappy & Nana- my parents
Her first outfit
With her Daddy

Time to go home

Happy (sad) tears

This is to officially welcome our precious baby girl Amellia Rose into the world. I am sorry that it has taken me a couple days to get this post up, I know many of you have been waiting for it. Life is kinda hectic with a newborn around. But I love every minute of it, even the middle of the night feedings. So here is her birth story and some pictures. I will try to keep this updated with what is going on, but not sure how much I will be able to get on.

Friday December 11, we had to be at the hospital for induction at 6 am. We were immediately shown to our delivery room and got settled in. They checked me when I first arrived and was at almost 5 cm already, but she was posterior or facing up rather than down. By 7:30 am Pitocin was started. They checked me again at 9am and I was close to 6 but not a lot of change. Contractions were about every 3-5 minutes but not very intense. Dr. said they would be back in an hr or two to break my water which should get things moving. A little before 11:30 am, Tommy and I were just getting ready to try to get some rest thinking we would have several hours till anything happened. But that didn't happen. Dr came in and broke my water at 11:30 am. The very next contraction was awful, and before it was even over I said I want an epidural NOW!! The Dr was called. It took about 15 min for him to get there and get set up. Meanwhile each contraction was worse and worse and closer together. I was breathing through them but barely. Finally at 12:05 pm the epidural was turned on. He stayed for a few minutes wanting to make sure it would take effect. It took the edge off but I still could feel them on my left side. So he had me roll on my left side to help it start working over there as well. Just as it was seeming to be working a bit better, the Dr came in and wanted to check me again for any further progress. She immediately said YOUR 10 CM, SHE IS TURNED AND ITS TIME!! Tommy and I just looked at each other as they all started running around getting everything ready. He text my family in the waiting room. And told my mom to hurry up and get in there. The next contraction they had me start pushing. I did a series of 3 pushes for each contraction, 4x and she was out. Born at 12:41 pm. An hour and 11 minutes after they broke my water. 6 lbs 5 oz 19 1/2 inches long. A full head of dark black hair, and perfect in every way. She had to have a little oxygen and be warmed up for a bit but otherwise she was fine. Her apgars were 8 and 9 (out of 10). I didn't get to hold her for about 45 minutes which was hard, but at the same time it just felt like a dream and I was in shock I believe as well. We had our rainbow baby!! When she was first handed to me I cried. It was happy, relieved tears. At that moment I fell completely in love for the 2nd time in my life. I kept asking Tommy to pinch me b/c it had to be a dream. But it was real and she was in our arms. Safe and sound after a long 9 months of stress, worry and doubt at times. By 3:30 pm I was moved to a new room. Amellia was brought in all bathed and looking beautiful. I loved watching her daddy hold and cuddle her. He had the biggest grin on his face. I also loved seeing my parents, Pappy and Nana with her as well. I was in the hospital all day Saturday and then release Sunday late afternoon. As we were leaving the hospital my emotions once again got the best of me. I flashed back to the previous two times leaving the hospital with only a box in my lap. This time I left w/ a car seat with my precious little baby girl in it. They were tears of joy mixed with the emotions of our two losses.

I find my emotions and feelings are very much intertwined between this new baby and our two that didn't make it. In fact I see so much of Logan and some of Emma in Amellia. I am so sad they arent here as well, but so thankful that Amellia did make it. So for all you deadbabymama's out there don't give up even when it seems as though there is no hope. Find a Dr that will help you to find answers and who wont give up until you bring your precious rainbow home. I hope and pray that each one of you will get to have this feeling. It was a long, hard, sad road but the end is perfect in every way. I will always miss my Emma and Logan and Amellia cant replace them, but it certainly makes the grief just a bit easier.

34 comments:

Monica said...

I've been checking everyday and so glad to finally see that for sure Amelia Rose is alright and with her mommy and daddy at home!! You don't know how much I needed this!!!! Please don't feel any pressure to post. Take the time you need to take care of Amelia and yourself and I have no doubt you are!!

Mirne said...

You are very, very lucky.

ezra'smommy said...

Congratulations! Welcome Amellia Rose!

Beth said...

oh sweetheart! i think this is the best news i have heard... well ever!! what a beautiful baby.. love all that hair.. I'm sorry Emma and Logan aren't there to share in the joy. Welcome home, Amelia Rose!

angie said...

Welcome to the world, Amellia. She is gorgeous. Congratulations.

CLC said...

She is gorgeous! Welcome Amellia! I have been checking all weekend for this....I am so happy for all of you!

AnxiousMummyto3 said...

Congratulations guys! She is absolutely beautiful. I am so overwhelmed to read your special news :)

JenJen said...

She is beautiful...with a headful of hair, too :) You deserve this so much after all the heartache that you have endured...

We did, sister, we did it :)

Marie said...

Welcome to the world, beautiful Amellia! Congrats to you and your family and having your prayers answered. She is so sweet!

Nana to Dillon said...

Manda,

I am so happy for you and your family. Your faith that God has a wonderful plan for your life has brought you a beautiful baby girl. She is beautiful.

I'm sure it feels like a fairytail when you take her in her beautiful bedroom and rock her. You deserve it, your faith brought you here.

I know your mom is relieved and delighted in this time. I remember holding my breath until my rainbow granddaughter arrived.

I look forward to following your blogging as you and Tommy continue to fall madly in love with this precious gift.

Again, I am so happy for you. The prayers will continue for you and your family. You will experience multiple emotions along the way. But, remember Emma and Logan are in the presence of our Holy Father and they want you to be happy. They are smilling down on you today.

Vonda (Nana to Dillon)

Tracey said...

Beautiful news - congratulations!

So very happy for you - Amellia Rose is a beautiful girl!

Allison (Ali) said...

Congrats, I have been lurking waiting to hear that you guys came home. She's beautiful, and wow what a head of hair.

Marie W said...

I have been anxious, just waiting for this post. I am so very happy for you and hubby (his big grin says it all), it is long awaited, and my heart soars with joy for you. I can see Emma and Logan looking down at you all and smiling. My sister said to me once, "what better guardian angel to have, but your own brother and sister?". Sending you all love and warm thoughts.

cowgirltn said...

She is so pretty. Congratulations!

Bree said...

Congratulations, Amanda! I saw a comment you had made on Jen's facebook- so I knew Amelia had arrived safely. So good to hear the story of her arrival and see her beautiful pictures.

Missy said...

Congratulations! I've been lurking for a while, and am so happy that your little rainbow baby has arrived. :)

Busted Kate said...

Beautiful!!! And look at that hair. Congratulations, couldn't be happier for you :-)

Just Breathe said...

She is perfect. Congratulations.
I am so happy for you.

missing_one said...

Good job Mama! Congrats to you all!

Monica H said...

SHe is gorgeous. You are gorgeous. What a beaming Dad!

Thank you for the update and pictures. You've travelled a long and windy road and you so deserve this. I wish you all the happiness in the world.

I'm over the moon for you!

AG said...

Congratulations Amanda. I'm so relieved that everything went well. Amellia is beautiful.

Ya Chun said...

YAY!

And look at that head of hair!

and how come you look so great after labor????? Huh?

Glad you are enjoying little Amellia, I am sure your heart is bursting with love right now.

Travelwahine said...

Much love to you and your family. Congratulations! I'm so happy and feel very lucky to share in your joy. Welcome to this world sweet baby girl!

diariesofajadedheart said...

Congratulations - she is a beauty.

Meghan said...

She's so so beautiful. I have been looking at all your photos of her on Facebook and I am so happy for you guys! Congrats, she's amazing!!

xxooo Meghan

Team Russi said...

What a beautiful little girl! Congratulations! I hope you're all happily adjusting to life together.

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Taylor Kane said...

I was browsing blogger when I stumbled upon this and let me just say I'm so touched by your blog. The music, the words, the pictures... you've brought tears to my eyes. Congratulations, I know you're going to be a great mother! <3 Amellia Rose is such a beautiful name. God bless you and your family forever.

Alex ,Tristan and Carmella said...

I was blog hopping when I came across your blog.
Very touching, I am father of three and your blog really moved me big time.
How is Amellia Rose doing? Hope you would post an up date of what she looks like now.

Jack said...

I was also blog hopping... what a touching story... thanks for sharing your painful memories... I wish you and your family all the best!

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Sharee (Hale) Jones said...

I was blog hopping as well...Thank you for your thoughts and your strength. People that have made it through this kind of sorrow have the deepest love and make all the difference in this world! Thank you and God Bless you and your family.